Leigh Jacobson
Editor-in-Chief
With graduation only a few short weeks away, most of us are enrolled at and committed to the universities we’ll be attending next semester. The process is finally over, and we’ve moved on to start our new educational careers in college…which, in the modern age, means updating our Facebook education, and joining those obligatory “Class of 2016” groups/pages which are so useful for entertaining procrastination during AP Week. And so anyone who’s in any “Class of 2016” group will know what I’m talking about when I point out five specific types of people you can find in almost any group– people, who, generally, have way too much free time on their hands.
1. The Over Enthusiast
Notorious for of their frequent posting, commenting, liking, etc., these people are the ones whose lives are utterly consumed by the thought of attending university in the fall. More often than not, this person is the one to actually have created the Class of 2016 group itself…six months before they were even accepted to the university. This individual also tends to be a serial friend-requester, capitalizing on the golden opportunity to expand their social network by sending out mass friend requests accompanied by perky greeting messages and a proliferation of smiley faces and exclamation points. Beware.
2. The Troll
No one can tell if these guys are being completely serious or not, or what exactly their purpose behind posting such strange and obnoxious things is. Sometimes their posts can induce a laugh or two, and maybe even a giggle. But most often, they’re downright strange and even sometimes disturbing. This category also includes the people attending rival schools who join the group and masquerade as incoming freshman at that university, only to be ousted by the overzealous Facebook stalkers (who usually fall under the first category).
3. The Undecided
Almost nothing beats watching the virtual smackdown that ensues after someone calls out a group member on being a part of multiple Class of 2016 college groups. When confronted, these individuals insist that they can’t make up their minds, and make the inspired decision to ask thousands of strangers on Facebook where they think they should go to school. Sometimes, they go so far as “Help, guys! Every single Ivy League school is paying me to go there, but I really want to attend this institution. Convince me that I should go here!!!” However, I can only assume that they are trolling as well, as I refuse to believe that these types of people exist in the real world.
4. The Shameless Self-Promoter
These people are the ones who trigger constant notifications because of their frequent posts pleading people to listen to their songs, like their business page, or check out their artwork online. As if it wasn’t bad enough that you’ve got people trying to constantly friend request you, annoy you with their asinine posts, or burden you with their college decision problems, you now have to deal with being spammed by people promoting themselves and their subpar artistic endeavors. These are the people whose friend requests you shouldn’t accept, unless you want your newsfeed to look like MySpace for the next four years.
5. The ones who observe it all and make a mental note to avoid the latter four types of people in the fall.
Really, no commentary for this one is necessary.
To read our previous article in the college series about the top five things you will hear on every college tour, click here.
To read our previous article in the college series about the top five mistakes to not make on the Common Application, click here.
To read our previous article in the college series about the top five thing questions you shouldn’t ask a senior, click here.
To read our previous article in the college series about the top five reasons to not apply to a college, click here.
To read our previous article in the college series about the top five ways to celebrate college acceptance, click here.
To read our previous article in the college series about the top five ways to handle college rejection, click here.
To read our previous article in the college series about the top five ways to wait for college decisions, click here.
To read our previous article in the college series about the top five ways to handle college deferral, click here.
Daniel • May 15, 2012 at 9:11 pm
I’m gonna miss this series when it’s gone 🙁
Ariana • May 16, 2012 at 9:52 am
Me too! These are the best!